THE “HARE ON A BIKE” HASH
Run Number: 430
Date: Monday 28 Apr 80
Time: 95 minutes
Distance: About 6 miles and a (big) bit
Run Location: Stourton Caundle
The Pub: The Trooper Inn
Pub Links: To follow
Weather: Dull, cool
Hares, Hounds and Hash Stats
THE WORDS
The pack gathered in the road opposite the Trooper having parked along the side of the road. Once the hare emerged from the pub we spent a few jolly minutes rearranging the cars in a herring pattern to please the landlord. Having laid the trail that afternoon our hare, Madness, was freshly changed and looking dapper with his trousers tucked into his socks (we went through the usual “have you left your Porsche up the road” jokes) by way of a clue that his latest injury required that he accompany us on his bicycle. It was good to see Two Shoes and Day Glo again who had both not run with us for a while. We also welcomed a new hound to the pack – Ian Seraph. While we waited we decided that Craig White’s handle should be Drama Queen (I’m not sure why). After a minimalist briefing by Madness we posed for the usual photo and we were off. Ronlet then kindly pinged me for the words, before I could even get into my stride, to the usual relieved approval from everyone else.
We went North and then at a check took a right into Drove Road where we noticed we had already lost Ian. The resulting search party found him trying to buy a house! At the next check, policed by our hare on a bike, we ploughed off into the fields led by Warthog. Before long we were badly scattered “Looking” and unable to find the trail with Day Glo almost vanishing over the horizon. After a bit Two Shoes noticed the hare frantically waving us towards the road and then led the charge to the check. We then set off again up the road and before long Ronlet copped for a Smilie face, soon after which we were off into the fields again. After galloping round a small wood we again lost Ian but this time the search party (Warthog) was called on to a check where Ian had appeared from a new direction – some previous hashing experience was emerging here. After a short distance on the tarmac, accompanied by our hare on his bike, we went left at a check into more fields. At this stage it was still impossible to tell if we were going clockwise or anti-clockwise and we just appeared to be going in the general direction of “away”. So we were relieved soon afterwards to emerge at a check at a crossroads manned by Madness, with beer available, on Caundle Lane. The best bit was that Staunton Caundle was clearly signed as only a mile away and we were about 40 minutes into the hash – nearly back at the pub then! How wrong we were.
After a beer and some token checking the pack ambled gently uphill past some very posh houses going West (the pack not the houses) with Ian and Silent Running leading. Silent Running took the right option at the next check and then carefully selected the wrong option at the one after that. The pack ran into a field where a check at a style required us to almost double back through a hedge and (once Kinky Bugger had given the right option a stiff ignoring) back to the road – where, you’ve guessed it, our hare was waiting with his trusty cycle. We then ran through Manor Farm where we were heckled by a herd of cattle and a chained fox terrier. Here our hare left us due to a strand of barbed wire across the route. Ah – time for a turn for home. Wrong – and we turned South and downhill into more large fields with long wet grass. At this stage Day Glo was kind enough to share with us that he “was about to let one go” – he was then well pleased with the surge of hounds accelerating past him. At Rum Coppice we were sure we had to turn for home but were again wrong as we had a long run West and round another small wood with a couple of checks on the way. The continuing string of unexpected turns had BrEW firmly locked to the back of the pack, harbouring his energy, in case it grew dark before we got to the pub. We then ended up on the road (strangely with no hare) and then unbelievingly turned South at the next check. First up the next hill was Jibber and here we were surprised to be joined by Birdseye, who had arrived at the start 15 minutes late and then found running all the checks on his own a bit of a challenge (but good effort).
After a diversion around New Leaze Farm we emerged back on the road through Staunton Caundle to be greeted by our hare on his bike to give us a verbal “On In”. When we got back to the pub the street was absolutely packed with parked cars – so we were a bit confused when we went into an empty bar for beers. The locals were all in a big meeting in the back room apparently. The Shaftesbury 3 vanished very quickly, late for skittles again, but don’t worry we’ll get their subs next week! The Sharps Doombar then proved very popular until 5 of us drove into Stur for a Curry. We all parked easily except for Two Shoes who was left with the half spaces to try to get into. In the end he settled for a disabled space and limped the first 20 yards after he locked his car to cries of “What? Pulled a muscle?”. The Curry House has no licence but prudent Madness kindly filled our glasses from the beer we failed to drink half way round. What planning! Madness not to!
Our grateful thanks go to Madness for laying such a devious and cunning trail as well as laying on excellent food and drink – and we hope the calf is better soon (the leg, not the young cow).
HARES, HOUNDS AND HASH STATS
Hare(s): Madness (on his bike)
Hounds:Birdseye, BrEW, Day Glo, Jibber, Kinky Bugger, Ronlet, Silent Running, Two Shoes, Warthog and Ian Seraph
Social Hounds/Puppy Hashers: Not this time
Real Hounds: Not this time
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MUG & T-SHIRT RATINGS
(??*) - Denotes attendance by those not Mug Rated (social hounds).
RED T-SHIRT AWARD (100 AND OVER) ….And we’ve got them – for £10!
Andy (Warthog) Goodman (220); Bronwen (Ronlet) Jones (191); Brian (BrEW) Errington-Weddle (152 + 4*); Ed (Birdseye) Sadd (138); Terry (Walt) Disney (132); Tim (Silent Running) Bryning (128 + 1*); Mark (Jibber) Humphries (127); Jason (Kinky Bugger) Wareham (100)
GOLD T-SHIRT AWARD (50 AND OVER)
Martin (Madness) Lawson (89 + 6*); Duncan (Day Glo) Ray (70+ 2*); Tim (Classic) King (69)
MUG AWARD AND CAN WEAR BLUE T-SHIRT (25 - 49)
John (Strider) Bryning (33); Helen (Elle) Goodman (30*); Gail (Tour Guide) Sadd (8 + 20*); Tom (Two Shoes) Gillard (27); Mark (Shady) Vincent (27); Rowland (Pet Rescue) Stibbards (26)
NEED MORE HASHES OR POSTING ORDER (10 - 24)
Graham (Hidden Depths) Plaice (19); Peter (Emptier) Fuller (17); Lesley (Tinkerbell) Bryning (15*); Pierre (Quelque Chose) Leroy (16); Ben (The Slobby Uno ♂) Sadd (13); Edward (The Wanderer) Vincent (12); Patrick (Sloe) Ginn (11); Sarah (..) Bryning (1 + 9*); Emma (…) Sadd (8 + 2*)
NEED MORE HASHES (5 - 9)
Wendy (…) Stibbards (8*); Jenny (…)Fuller (3 + 4*); Paul (Crazy Fool) Kadoch (7); James (i-Plod) Vincent (7); Alan (Orson) Kerridge (6); Clare (The Slobby Uno ♀) Sadd (4 + 2*); Manuela (…)Leroy (5*)
KEEP HASHING (1 - 4)
Nikki (Xtra Miles) Brooks (4); Andy (Muddy) Cheney (4); Steve Thornton (4); Pierre Leroy Jnr (3); Rebecca Leroy (3*); Fiona (…) Ray (1+2*); Paul Allen (2); David Orriss (2); Elsie May Ray (2*); Alf Sadd (2*); Janice Vincent (2*); Chantelle Wareham (2); Craig (Drama Queen)White (3); Jane Allen (1); Sandie Disney (1*); Renee Ginn (1*); Ben King (1+1*); Alice King (1*); George King (1*); Sarah King (1); Mike Lock (1); Colin McGrory (1); Hilary Naylor (1); Emma Rae (1); Ian (..) Seraph (1); Jon (Circus Boy) Smallwood (1); Fiona Vincent (1*)
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Price: Madness # 430 |
