THE “HAMBLEDON BLUFF” HASH
Run Number: 437
Date: Monday 30 Jun 08
Time: 77 minutes
Distance: 5 miles and a bit
Run Location: Iwerne Minster
The Pub: The Talbot Inn
Pub Links: To follow
Weather: Sunny and warm
Hares, Hounds and Hash Stats
THE WORDS
Don’t assume from the title that there is a new geographical feature in Dorset! The pack gathered in the car park of the Talbot Inn on a pleasant summer’s evening. We admired Orson’s and Madness’s good but cut off tans from their recent cycling trip. Kinky Bugger and Jibber arrived just in time for the briefing by our hares for the run, BrEW and Ronlet. Despite the relaxed approach, some detected a rehearsed element especially the casual mention of going on Hambledon Hill. We were promised horses and bullocks (I think that’s what they said) and we were also promised at least one whip in and at least one smilie face. A smiling Ronlet then pinged me for the words to the relief of everyone else. BrEW took the photo having ushered us away from the sports car for sale which we naturally gathered around and, with a hint regarding direction, we were off.
We went North and promptly lost half the pack, led by Two Shoes, running around in the School. It was noticed this early that Ronlet was not with us and presumably relaying the trail already! We then looped around clockwise in the village with Strider doing most of the (uphill) hard work. Silent Running led until a T-junction with a freshly mown path, with covered dabs, which resulted in no shouts from those on track and which left the recent leader badly adrift. We then emerged back on the main road very near the pub (some VERY fresh dust here) and eventually Jibber found the On! through a housing estate into some open fields. We soon encountered 3 fine and lively horses who apparently wanted to run with us. Next we met 3 lady runners running in the opposite direction, who were convinced we were running the wrong way and were vocal enough to tell us so. Someone mentioned cheeky mares – or were they still talking about the horses?
We then ran through a field which seemed vaguely familiar from a previous hash and where Ronlet had to point out a check in the middle of a field. After a communal dither (and a comfort break for Madness) we pressed on up a muddy track and found the trail across a field full of excited bullocks, which seemed to want to stand wherever we wanted to run. Strider hurtled in front of them and over a style almost in time to get half the pack caught in a stampede. Laxative effects were noticed both by pack and herd!
A short jog along a lane brought us to another check by a gate and it was through this and by the side of a corn field that Jibber led us, eventually into a clover field and another check, which had us scratching our heads for a while. We could see we were near where we had come before – over one gate the excited bullocks gathered again, so no-one fancied that way. Eventually a reluctant Two Shoes found that, contrary to his expectations, he had the On and it was a long haul up a hill to a dairy farm and past some contented looking cows.
We then headed along a narrow road in the worrying direction of Hambledon Hill. At a check Strider and Silent Running built up a good lead as the pack were unable to hear the On called due to a slowly passing car (honest!). The pack then found a whip in at the bottom of Hambledon thoughtfully provided with a bench for the older hounds. Madness observed that the signpost had seen better days. Someone else remarked that those on the bench had seen better days too!
Given the order to check it out Strider charged off up the track to Hambledon. Spotting the bluff Walt carefully led the way up the road which proved correct. At the next check Silent Running was called back from a falsie by a confident call of On! On! only to find he had been correct all along and just managed to resume the lead. Crafty Ronlet quietly ushered the pack away from one of the last checks with Strider still checking hard. Kinky Bugger was first home thanks to some local knowledge, picked up while repairing a water pump on the fish farm. It turned out that we never did see a smilie face – just goes to prove that old hash saying “Never believe the briefing”.
The Talbot served good beers, costly but tasty sausages and had no pollock (Oh Pollocks!). Our grateful thanks go to BrEW and Ronlet for laying such a devious, cunning trail and for taking us to, but not up, Hambledon Hill – so that was just a bluff then?
HARES, HOUNDS AND HASH STATS
Hare(s): Ronlet and BrEW
Hounds: Jibber, Kinky Bugger, Madness, Orson, Silent Running, Strider, Two Shoes, Walt
Social Hounds/Puppy Hashers: Not this time
Real Hounds: Not this time
Back to The Words
MUG & T-SHIRT RATINGS
(??*) - Denotes attendance by those not Mug Rated (social hounds).
RED T-SHIRT AWARD (100 AND OVER) ….And we’ve got them – for £10!
Andy (Warthog) Goodman (226); Bronwen (Ronlet) Jones (199); Brian (BrEW) Errington-Weddle (159 + 4*); Terry (Walt) Disney (140); Ed (Birdseye) Sadd (140); Tim (Silent Running) Bryning (135 + 1*); Mark (Jibber) Humphries (135); Jason (Kinky Bugger) Wareham (108)
GOLD T-SHIRT AWARD (50 AND OVER)
Martin (Madness) Lawson (94 + 6*); Duncan (Day Glo) Ray (70+ 2*); Tim (Classic) King (69)
MUG AWARD AND CAN WEAR BLUE T-SHIRT (25 - 49)
John (Strider) Bryning (35); Tom (Two Shoes) Gillard (34); Helen (Elle) Goodman (30*); Gail (Tour Guide) Sadd (8 + 20*); Mark (Shady) Vincent (27); Rowland (Pet Rescue) Stibbards (26); Graham (Hidden Depths) Plaice (25)
NEED MORE HASHES OR POSTING ORDER (10 - 24)
Peter (Emptier) Fuller (19); Pierre (Quelque Chose) Leroy (18); Lesley (Tinkerbell) Bryning (15*); Ben (The Slobby Uno ♂) Sadd (13); Edward (The Wanderer) Vincent (12); Patrick (Sloe) Ginn (11); Sarah (..) Bryning (1 + 9*); Alan (Orson) Kerridge (9+1*); Emma (…) Sadd (8 + 2*)
NEED MORE HASHES (5 - 9)
Paul (Crazy Fool) Kadoch (9); Wendy (…) Stibbards (8*); Jenny (…)Fuller (3 + 4*); James (i-Plod) Vincent (7); Craig (Drama Queen)White (7); Clare (The Slobby Uno ♀) Sadd (4 + 2*); Manuela (…)Leroy (5*)
KEEP HASHING (1 - 4)
Nikki (Xtra Miles) Brooks (4); Andy (Muddy) Cheney (4); Hilary Naylor (4); Steve Thornton (4); Pierre Leroy Jnr (3); Rebecca Leroy (3*); Mike (…) Lock (3); Fiona (…) Ray (1+2*); Paul Allen (2); David Orriss (2); Elsie May Ray (2*); Alf Sadd (2*); Ian (House Hunter) Seraph (2); Janice Vincent (2*); Chantelle Wareham (2); Jane Allen (1); Sandie Disney (1*); Renee Ginn (1*); Ben King (1+1*); Alice King (1*); George King (1*); Sarah King (1); Colin McGrory (1); Emma Rae (1); Jon (Circus Boy) Smallwood (1); Fiona Vincent (1*)
Back to The Words
Price: Ronlet & BrEW # 437 |
